Articles Tagged ‘feedback’

Self Awareness Can Be Learned

Wednesday, October 27th, 2010

The other day I got a rather heated email from someone stating that the reason they didn’t accomplish a task was because I didn’t remind them. My initial reaction was to be very spiteful and aggressive back. It took me a moment to recognize what I was feeling and what I was frustrated with. I was frustrated that the person was trying to shift blame for there own failings. Reality was that I did my job just the way I was supposed to. Once I took the time to understand what I was feeling and what the person was doing, I was able to respond without anger and in a manner that honored all involved.

I have started to read more on Emotional Intelligence. The first pillar is Self Awareness. People with a healthy sense of self-awareness are “comfortable in their own skin.” They understand their strengths, weaknesses, emotions, and impact on others.

An article from Susan Davis, entitled Business EQ: Being Aware of Your Emotions, captures the idea that Self Awareness starts with Self Confidence that allows us to accurately understand our true abilities and goals. She also indicates that self awareness is something that can certainly be learned.

For me the best way I learn is through slowing down and talking honestly with friends. Prior to responding and just reacting (especially when the emotions are anger or insecurity), I sit in the moment, slow down, and wait until I become aware of myself. I am then able to respond from a position of truth. I also glean much from insight of friends. Friends that are willing to look at me and state “You are very upset and I think it is because…” are truly valuable.

I think there are many methods and I would hate to miss an opportunity because I didn’t ask for feedback. So, please share with me what are methods you use to become more self aware.

Brook M. Avey, CPA

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